Saturday, June 9, 2012

2- Robo-Genitals


Dane: I think we'll do everyone else in the action so that the plot can move along. We're behind schedule.
Kyle: K
Ian: Who is opening the plot?
Dane: Joe and Soo, they're characters are plot-linked.
Kyle: What did you do you son of a bitch?
Joe: Nothing. I merely offered her suggestions on what stats to pursue. If they happen to be a positive resource for my character, that's just a bonny bit of synergy now isn't it?
Soo: Joe you used me?
Joe: Technically, I haven't.I just gave you enough metaphorical drinks to get the tail I need later.
Kyle: You're the only person on Earth who would use date-rape as a euphemism.
Dane: Let's just start, we'll shun Joe later.
Joe: My character is GR210, a Class-3 Steam Mech.
Kyle: An 8-foot tall, modular combat robot. Capable of massive, spur of the moment min/maxing by way of changing parts.
Joe: Yep. It's a shame the parts are prohibitively expensive for all but the most *pats Soo* affluent.
Soo: I could just, you know, NOT buy your customizable parts.
Kyle: Again, I think I love you.
Joe: You could. Except I intentionally made my stock configuration utterly useless. And if I die, I'm going to reroll an exact copy. You have a choice between using your limitless wealth to make me into a massive pimptacular killing engine, or burden the party with almost a full ton of useless copper.
Ian: Is it possible to visualize Joe saying something WITHOUT also adding an evil laugh and a volcano lair?
Dane: Not to my knowledge...
Dane: Let's get started.
Ian: Wee! Exposition.
Dane: [GM] It is the year 721 of the Imperial Reign. The last Emperor, Cassius Reveshad the Bloody Handed, has passed away after ruling for over 100 years. His daughter, the 59 year old progressive Hildiyara the First has taken the Imperial circlet. For the first time in the Imperia's history, there is talk of the nobles usurping the heir to the throne. The Empress has enacted polices in support of the working class, ostracizing the ruling elite. An cease-fire has been called on the front lines of the great war between the Imperia and it's foes in the Federation: the communistic Union, the Elven Tribes, the Xiao-Seng and the P'tashi desertfolk. The world is technically at peace, but it's closer to oblivion then ever before.
Joe: A cease-fire is just a fancy name for a mid-murder nap.
Dane: [GM] Amid this turmoil, life goes on. Young noblewoman Kali'nara d'Vostog and her...
Joe: Giant Best-Friend Robot.
Dane: [GM] I'm not saying that.
Soo: He's not saying that.
Dane: [GM] Fine. She and GR210, a steampunk robot she doesn't know, are traveling to a meeting outside of town by way of motorcar. You've been hired to carry out a money exchange for the safe return of Dillon Johnson, a local businessman who was kidnapped.
Soo: And Archibald.
Kyle: Who?
Soo: Archibald is my faithful driver and lackey. I got enough points in Status and Resources that I get a follower for free.
Dane: [GM] Yes, Archibald is driving the car.
Dane: [GM] You arrive at the meeting spot along a country road. The light is purple as the sun sets.
Soo: I get out of the car, grabbing the suitcase full of money. Archibald follows me. I ask the robot "Will you be coming?".
Joe: GR210, gets out of the car. Wherever the kidnappers are, they are surely impressed with his amazing robotic form. They've certainly begun to wonder both if he has functional robo-genitals and if it's hard to get him to use them. 
Ian: Is 'robo-genitals' a word?

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