Wednesday, June 20, 2012

8- Break

Dane: [GM] I gotta hit the loo guys. Let's take a short break anyhow. 
Soo: That's why I played a character who doesn't talk much. I've been to the bathroom twice since we started, no one even noticed I was gone.
Ian: Twice?
Joe: Soo has a bladder the size of a walnut.
Kyle: Is this conversation point really pressing?
Joe: Hey, if Emo-Stain is gonna hit on a woman, he may as well know all the details.
Ian: Hey!
Soo: Someone's hitting on me?
Kyle: Ian being single doesn't mean he's hitting on Soo.
Joe: Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. Nerds are like hydrogen and oxygen. Deep down, the unjoined ones want to get together and make something wet.
Soo: That's the most disgusting, and possibly illogical analogy I've heard all day from you. I don't know. I'm not a chemist.
Ian: So wait. If nerds are hydrogen and oxygen, whose the other hydrogen in H2O?
Joe: The Filipino transvestite you hired on Craigslist for 50 bucks to choke you while you pleasure yourself. Obviously. Unless you want to be in one of those super-tame carbon monoxide relationships.
Soo: Am I the only one here troubled by the fact Joe's the only married one here?
Kyle: Soo, Dane is as asexual as a sponge. Ian hasn't had a date since high school. I'm 23 and dating a college freshman who thinks I'm "deep and mature". Joe isn't just the married one, he's quite possibly the only one with a constructive relationship.
Soo: Ian, why does Joe keep calling you an emo?
Joe: Because rudimentary trait identification is a hallmark of cognitive development.
Ian: I... um... 
Ian: Went through a 'phase', when I was a freshman. You know, people reinventing themselves, trying new things, trying to find what's inside.
Joe: ... and Ian found bad haircuts and The Cure.
Ian: I grew out of it pretty fast, but certain people. don't believe in letting shit go.
Joe: Emo-Stain, I have an ALBUM of that shitty monochrome photography you used to put up on the internet. I have more pictures of underdeveloped, crying kids than a pedophile's scrapbook.
Joe: And when you die, I'm putting it in the casket right under your slit wrist tattoo. 
Dane: [GM] Okay I'm back. 
Dane: [GM] ...
Dane: [GM] Joe, what the fuck is wrong with you.
Joe: 50 bucks is actually pretty much the going rate for that. Shop around. I know I have.

1 comment:

  1. Hm, I wonder if my friends have ever referred to me as being "As asexual as a sponge". I don't think so sadly. I guess I hide it better unintentionally.