Friday, June 20, 2014

122- Mostly Steroids

Dane: [GM] Okay let's see an attack roll then.
Dane: [GM] The shot Kali snapped off seems to have struck true and it blows a chunk out of the monster's skull as it flails around. It begins to stagger about letting out horrific growls and moans.
Joe: [OOC] Sounds like me after lovemaking.
Kyle: [OOC] I hate you.
Soo: [Kali dVostog] "I think it's coming down! Everyone out of the way!"
Joe: [Lord Beefstorm] Beefstorm rolls up his sleeves and yells "This one's for Techie! I will avenge her!"
Ian: [Mari Shasho] "Um..."
Dane: [Techie] "I'm still alive."
Joe: [Lord Beefstorm] "No time to worry about such concrete facts. I need to get justice for you, fallen friend!" Beefstorm runs forward with a fist raised for a punch. "BEEFSTORM SECRET TECHNIQUE: MEAT HURRICANE FIST!" 
Soo: [OOC] I'm horrified, my character is confused. What is going on?
Joe: [OOC] One of the many sacred martial arts of Kali and Beef's family. She was probably never taught them because she's so disappointing.
Kyle: [OOC] The d'Vostog family, an aristocratic family in a psuedo-Victorian steampunk/magical fantasy world, has ancient sacred martial arts?
Joe: [OOC] I said 'sacred' I never said ancient. It's kind of a new secret art. Fifteen years tops.
Dane: [GM] Not to interrupt this but that punch connected and did so little damage the current rules system doesn't have a term for that damage grade so I'm just going to call it 'Joe Level'. But anyhow the monster staggers around on fire and finally flops on the ground dead with a terrific thud.
Joe: [Lord Beefstorm] Beef bows respectfully at the monster's corpse. "You fought well, monster-sama."
Ian: [OOC] So wait. If you can do about zero damage with that attack, why did you do it?
Joe: [OOC] Beefstorm is the heir to the family's secret martial arts. He has to use them in glorious battle. The fact I dumped all my points into social skills and left him with strength stats so low he should, by all rights, not be able to support his own weight is secondary.
Kyle: [OOC] Didn't you say he was really muscular when we met him?
Joe: [OOC] Yes but that's just for show. Mostly just lots of steroids.
Soo: [OOC] I would question the logic of that idea but I really don't want to break this inane flow.

1 comment: