63- Huge Pile of Animal Manure

Soo: [OOC] I'm going to miss Mari. She was fun in a pyromaniacal cable TV lesbian kind of way.
Kyle: [OOC] That probably caused it, Soo. We don't have a black guy to die first and usually when that fails it's either the cool guy who can do a lot of damage or whoever else fails to fit the heteronormative core demographic. Mari being both kind of called it.
Joe: [OOC] Oh Mari boy~ The pipes, the pipes are calling~
Ian: [OOC] For the love of Gygax guys, I haven't even hit the ground yet.
Dane: [GM] Well, time to roll for some impact. Rest assured Ian, as much as I might SEEM to enjoy rolling for damage on your character I really don't. I just get a little satisfaction from it that makes my pants feel tight.
Dane: [GM] ... 
Soo: [OOC] I'm not sure if that's a good thing.
Joe: [OOC] He's either stalling because he has to explain away utterly minimal damage, or he rolled horrific damage and he's trying to come up with a way of describing it that won't hurt Ian's feelings too much.
Dane: [GM] Mari plummets to the ground below. She manages to right herself a little bit but ultimately flops face first into a huge pile of animal manure being unloaded from another nearby airship. Ian, give yourself one minor wound.
Ian: [OOC] I'm happy Mari survived and all, but you couldn't think of something besides a giant truck of animal crap?
Dane: [GM] I thought to myself that any way of solving the scene would be shitty, then it just struck me. Well, I mean it struck YOU technically... or you struck it... I really need to look into the grammar.
Soo: [Kali dVostog] Kali runs down the stairs of the boarding scaffold and runs over. "Mari! Mari says something!" she yells.
Ian: [Mari Shasho] Mari waves an arm from within the pile of fertilizer. "L...little help here would be nice."
Kyle: [Bailey Hunt] Bailey comes down and helps pull her out.
Joe: [GR-210] GR skitters down the ramp and putters around. "Are we quite done pretending we care about Mari? Someone just tried to kill us."
Dane: [GM] The airship that exploded has drifted off and crashed in the side of the airfield. You're reasonably safe where you are.
Dane: [Danielle] Danielle stands around, looking off into the middle distance. One lock of her hair just finished burning halfway off like the wick of a candle. "At least master GR-210 is safe..."
Kyle: [OOC] Oh yes, THANK GOD for that...
Soo: [Kali dVostog] "Normally I'd question if something that happens near us is inherently related to us, but I'm starting to sense a trend."
Kyle: [Bailey Hunt] Bailey nods. "True 'nuff. I'm startin' ta think other parties're in this 'ere rodeo."
Joe: [OOC] Rodeo? Did Bailey just evolve from southern accent to full-ass cowboy.
Ian: [OOC] Full-Ass Cowboy sounds like the name of a website you'd clear from your browser.
Dane: [GM] A man walks over to the group. He's impeccably dressed in a clean white suit despite the muddy surroundings. He also seems to be unphased by the carnage going on on the other side of you. He looks to be middle aged and has his hair combed back. "Vell, zis seems to be quite zhe shpectacle, no?"
Joe: [OOC] He's in a suit, he combs his hair back and he has an indeterminate European accent. He's a villain. I will end him.
Soo: [OOC] For once, I think I agree with Joe.
Ian: [OOC] Makes you feel like something inside you died, doesn't it?